Saturday, December 17, 2011

Born to Not Shop–Absolutely


Have I mentioned how much I hate to shop? If I already have, please bear with me.  I hate it.  I mean really, really hate it.  Except when I am shopping for sweet Isabella- but that really doesn't count.  Or when I am on vacation shopping at cute boutiques and overpriced souvenir shops. That doesn't count either.

I mean when you have to get food to eat, or Christmas lights the day before the big party you are hosting. Or something cute to wear to the big Christmas party you are hosting. Or gifts. I am a cheerful giver. Love to give the gifts. Hate to shop for the gifts.

There are few absolutes in this world. It will rain right after you wash the car or dog. And you will forget your umbrella. And it is dress up night at the symphony. Not talking about those absolutes. I am talking about shopping absolutes.

I absolutely will not find a close parking place. The cart return will be miles away.

It absolutely will be raining when I get there, or when I leave the store headed for my car parked in another city.  I absolutely will leave my umbrella in the car.  Or at the last store.

Whatever I am shopping for will absolutely not be at the first store I go to.

When I do find it, it will absolutely be the wrong size and/or color.  And color is very important.  Only one shade of blue, that you almost never can find, looks half-decent on me.  No other color. None. Nada. That is why I almost always wear black. Doesn't look good on me, but is safe.

I absolutely will look ridiculous in any of the trendy styles. Even safe ones, like those cute long, skinny scarves of a couple of years ago.  Made me look 18 inches tall. Like a little pygmy.

I absolutely will lose my list about half-way through the Christmas shopping trip.  So, I will absolutely buy the same gift twice.  It will go into the return pile.  I absolutely will miss the return date.  And it will be re-gifted.  Hopefully not to the person I gave it to originally…blah, blah, blah.  Never done that before.  Well, I think I have, but the recipient was much to nice to mention it.  I have a kind and thoughtful family – most of the time!  The good news is that if I get this re-gifted gift back this year my memory is so bad I will not remember giving it last year.  So there.  Problem is not a problem anymore.

Guess I had better get off this computer.  The Christmas party has not changed dates, it is still tomorrow night and I have much yet to do.  Including taking back the cute little Christmas trees I bought at Wal-Mart last night to go on either side of our front door.  Lighted and everything.  Even in their own cute pots.  And, I got the last ones available- the ones on display, so I knew the lights worked.  Remember when I said cute “little” Christmas trees?  Well, they look TINY on my front porch.  Pitiful.  And, do you know how much traffic there will be at Wal-Mart today?  Humm, maybe they would look nice in the back yard….

Until next time…enjoy a first birthday photo of the Princess taken by W. June Photography.  Real cuteness, right?



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